Fie for Thought
Monday, July 30, 2007
I woke up, from a dream. I hear noise outside. Was too tired, too sick to get up. I had to, I'm in the office. I forced my weakened body up, dragging my leg towards the door. I hear someone talking, but I can't make out what she was talking about. Dizziness overcame me. I struggled to the door, and opened it.
"FIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! You're still here?!!! How come you're inside? Sleeping? *touches my forehead* You've got fever! Aiyo! Why never go home!? *pulls me to the living room* Must go home! See doctor ok?! So poor thing! *takes my guitar and pushes me out of the office* Now you go home and rest and don't forget to see the doctor! Go home go! Don't stay here! You need lots of rest! Go go!"
And I stood there for 5 minutes thinking what just happened. All that happened in less than.. a minute? She's the housekeeper, more like the office keeper of my company. This petite 35++ philipino lady. Stun, blur. No comments.
"FIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! You're still here?!!! How come you're inside? Sleeping? *touches my forehead* You've got fever! Aiyo! Why never go home!? *pulls me to the living room* Must go home! See doctor ok?! So poor thing! *takes my guitar and pushes me out of the office* Now you go home and rest and don't forget to see the doctor! Go home go! Don't stay here! You need lots of rest! Go go!"
And I stood there for 5 minutes thinking what just happened. All that happened in less than.. a minute? She's the housekeeper, more like the office keeper of my company. This petite 35++ philipino lady. Stun, blur. No comments.
Friday, July 27, 2007
Take just 10 minutes of your time after you read this and think of the things that you miss the most.
Really think it through and remember it. It'll be better if you're staring at something far away or close your eyes.
Then, come back to reality.
How do you feel?
Now smile instead.
Really think it through and remember it. It'll be better if you're staring at something far away or close your eyes.
Then, come back to reality.
How do you feel?
Now smile instead.
Friday, July 20, 2007
3 more days. Just 3 more days before I can just let myself loose for a few hours on the beach. Got home tired and sleepy everyday. Work, home, sleep. And it goes on and on. The overtimes are till 8-10pm everyday. I start work at 845am sharp. Never late, always early. The work requires non-stop hand work for hours. I get paid $7.64 per hour and $11.22 for OTs. I get laughed at for being silly to work so hard for such a low pay. People told me to go find another better job that fully meet my diploma. I'm loosing my cheerfulness.
So why the hell am I still working here? Its the hard way up to be the person that I want to be. A professional audio engineer. Early sacrifices have to be made. It's hard to keep a smiling face when all of those things above are going on. Always wished to have someone to hug for comfort after a hard day's work. She'll come sooner or later, people will say. I've got no time to look anyway. For now, I'll make do with my mum's love. Not to forget my little bro. I love them.
Ain't he cute?
So why the hell am I still working here? Its the hard way up to be the person that I want to be. A professional audio engineer. Early sacrifices have to be made. It's hard to keep a smiling face when all of those things above are going on. Always wished to have someone to hug for comfort after a hard day's work. She'll come sooner or later, people will say. I've got no time to look anyway. For now, I'll make do with my mum's love. Not to forget my little bro. I love them.
Ain't he cute?
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
She lives by the water
By Club 8
She lives by the water.
Not so far from me.
I sometimes go and see her.
I know she's there for me.
She's something for the longing
And i know where she belongs
She's got a place in my heart
While lovers come and go
Chorus
Was it easy?
Was it hard?
Not to be a part of it all.
When you changed,
they said you were strange.
She lives by the water
Not so far from me
I sometimes go and see her
I know she's there for me
Was it easy?
Was it hard?
Not to be a part of it all
When you changed
they said you were strange
Give in
or give up
They say that it's hard and
She says it's difficult
to stop once you've started
By Club 8
She lives by the water.
Not so far from me.
I sometimes go and see her.
I know she's there for me.
She's something for the longing
And i know where she belongs
She's got a place in my heart
While lovers come and go
Chorus
Was it easy?
Was it hard?
Not to be a part of it all.
When you changed,
they said you were strange.
She lives by the water
Not so far from me
I sometimes go and see her
I know she's there for me
Was it easy?
Was it hard?
Not to be a part of it all
When you changed
they said you were strange
Give in
or give up
They say that it's hard and
She says it's difficult
to stop once you've started
Monday, July 16, 2007
Sunday, July 15, 2007
I'll find you later
Loving you, was all I ever wanted.
Leaving you, my heart just shattered.
Everyday, I think of you.
Every single day, I'm missing you, ooh.
Chorus
I say goodbye now don't you cry.
Cause I'll find you later its not a lie. x2
In the rain, my pain was washed away.
Shivering cold, I wished for another day.
Though I know, that day will never come.
But still I wait, hopelessly blinded and numb.
Chorus
I say goodbye now don't you cry.
Cause I'll find you later its not a lie. x2
Bridge
I'm missing you.
I wanna be there for you.
Baby, its true,
My love for you.
Chorus
I say goodbye now don't you cry.
Cause I'll find you later its not a lie.
Loving you, was all I ever wanted.
Leaving you, my heart just shattered.
Everyday, I think of you.
Every single day, I'm missing you, ooh.
Chorus
I say goodbye now don't you cry.
Cause I'll find you later its not a lie. x2
In the rain, my pain was washed away.
Shivering cold, I wished for another day.
Though I know, that day will never come.
But still I wait, hopelessly blinded and numb.
Chorus
I say goodbye now don't you cry.
Cause I'll find you later its not a lie. x2
Bridge
I'm missing you.
I wanna be there for you.
Baby, its true,
My love for you.
Chorus
I say goodbye now don't you cry.
Cause I'll find you later its not a lie.
Thursday, July 12, 2007
I would like to dedicate this post to a friend, Uncle Eng Soon, an ex-colleague at MacD, who had just passed away on Monday, 9th of July. He died of colon cancer.
An ever smiling man, though he was just a little taller than the counter top. Born a midget, but that didn't stop him from supporting himself. He was the maintainance guy at the restaurant, always there to repair or service. After work, he would be seen around the neighbourhood collecting cardboard boxes. He always wears his black cap everywhere he goes. His voice is coarse but high pitch and makes it comical to talk to him at times. Never fails to bring a smile to anyone.
During my MacD days, I remember, whenever I work with him, I'll definitely disturb him or just irritate him for fun. He'll retaliate by making a lot of noise. There was once, he "chased" me around the restaurant after I ate his sundae, making a hell lot of noise in the restaurant. It will all end with me carrying him with one hand while he "struggle" to beat me. Lol. 2 years I was working there and for 2 years I've known him, I've never seen him loose his cheerfulness. The last I spoke to him was when I returned back to the MacD about 1 year before he passed away. Still remember what we talk about;
"Eng soon! Buy me sundae lah, long time no see what!"
"You want me to smack you is it?"
We laughed and he went on with his business. Never see him again after that. Last I heard about him was that he was hospitalized for 3 months. Never get the ward. And on Wednesday, 11th July, Irawati called me to tell me about his wake. Went down straight after work. Almost everyone who work with him at MacD came over to pay respect. I always wanted to have a gathering but not in this way. When we're at his wake, we looked at each other. Can't actually believe that 5 years has passed since we last work with each other. Everyone's doing their own things, let it be studying, working or NS, but there's just this familiar feeling when we're all there together. The same feeling we had when we're 15-17 years old. I bet all of them had the same feeling.
Though its been awhile since I've talked to him, I can't deny that I mourned quietly. I missed him and now I couldn't get the chance to meet him again. He was a good friend. Today while working, I thought of the times we shared while working or just after school. It seemed so recent, like a year back. I'm sure the rest of us had that thought too.
Still have a picture of us together on one of the guy's birthday. Dug up my personal cupboard and found it; the only picture we had. Used to be 1 big happy family in a restaurant. Now 1 less.
An ever smiling man, though he was just a little taller than the counter top. Born a midget, but that didn't stop him from supporting himself. He was the maintainance guy at the restaurant, always there to repair or service. After work, he would be seen around the neighbourhood collecting cardboard boxes. He always wears his black cap everywhere he goes. His voice is coarse but high pitch and makes it comical to talk to him at times. Never fails to bring a smile to anyone.
During my MacD days, I remember, whenever I work with him, I'll definitely disturb him or just irritate him for fun. He'll retaliate by making a lot of noise. There was once, he "chased" me around the restaurant after I ate his sundae, making a hell lot of noise in the restaurant. It will all end with me carrying him with one hand while he "struggle" to beat me. Lol. 2 years I was working there and for 2 years I've known him, I've never seen him loose his cheerfulness. The last I spoke to him was when I returned back to the MacD about 1 year before he passed away. Still remember what we talk about;
"Eng soon! Buy me sundae lah, long time no see what!"
"You want me to smack you is it?"
We laughed and he went on with his business. Never see him again after that. Last I heard about him was that he was hospitalized for 3 months. Never get the ward. And on Wednesday, 11th July, Irawati called me to tell me about his wake. Went down straight after work. Almost everyone who work with him at MacD came over to pay respect. I always wanted to have a gathering but not in this way. When we're at his wake, we looked at each other. Can't actually believe that 5 years has passed since we last work with each other. Everyone's doing their own things, let it be studying, working or NS, but there's just this familiar feeling when we're all there together. The same feeling we had when we're 15-17 years old. I bet all of them had the same feeling.
Though its been awhile since I've talked to him, I can't deny that I mourned quietly. I missed him and now I couldn't get the chance to meet him again. He was a good friend. Today while working, I thought of the times we shared while working or just after school. It seemed so recent, like a year back. I'm sure the rest of us had that thought too.
Still have a picture of us together on one of the guy's birthday. Dug up my personal cupboard and found it; the only picture we had. Used to be 1 big happy family in a restaurant. Now 1 less.
The ever cheerful
Uncle Eng Soon
May you rest in peace
Uncle Eng Soon
May you rest in peace
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
I took a walk to far away.
Away from it all,
Away from pain.
A walk i took alone,
With obstacles along the way.
To accomplish it is a miracle,
With your help,
Guiding my heart along the way.
Every path there is a way through,
Every barrier can be passed.
Life is a disease,
Which will cause pain and suffering,
And eventually death.
But the painkiller for this suffering,
Is another life.
Another soul,
Another disease.
To share the pain,
And to walk the path together.
To defy the curse life has given,
And walk through it with heads held high,
Hand in hand.
Away from it all,
Away from pain.
A walk i took alone,
With obstacles along the way.
To accomplish it is a miracle,
With your help,
Guiding my heart along the way.
Every path there is a way through,
Every barrier can be passed.
Life is a disease,
Which will cause pain and suffering,
And eventually death.
But the painkiller for this suffering,
Is another life.
Another soul,
Another disease.
To share the pain,
And to walk the path together.
To defy the curse life has given,
And walk through it with heads held high,
Hand in hand.
Monday, July 09, 2007
At the ocean, slowly walking,
At the waters edge I stand.
While the breeze blows over my body,
I slide my fingers through the sand.
As the mist comes off the water,
I taste the salt upon my lips.
I see two children building castles,
And in the distance passing ships.
I wonder if love is like this,
Passing close... but cannot touch.
I quickly think of something different,
To my heart this thought's too much.
Sand crabs dance across the shore line,
Dart into their home beneath,
Stick their heads back out slowly,
As I pass they take a peek.
The smell of freshness overwhelming,
The ocean's green then turns to blue.
Down the shoreline I keep walking,
But my thoughts return to you.
I look up and see a figure,
And this picture makes me sigh.
My heart beats fast, for just a moment,
But it's not you who passes by.
So I walk on into evening,
Thinking, perhaps I'll meet you there,
But as the sun sets on the ocean,
My mind is here, my heart is there.
At the waters edge I stand.
While the breeze blows over my body,
I slide my fingers through the sand.
As the mist comes off the water,
I taste the salt upon my lips.
I see two children building castles,
And in the distance passing ships.
I wonder if love is like this,
Passing close... but cannot touch.
I quickly think of something different,
To my heart this thought's too much.
Sand crabs dance across the shore line,
Dart into their home beneath,
Stick their heads back out slowly,
As I pass they take a peek.
The smell of freshness overwhelming,
The ocean's green then turns to blue.
Down the shoreline I keep walking,
But my thoughts return to you.
I look up and see a figure,
And this picture makes me sigh.
My heart beats fast, for just a moment,
But it's not you who passes by.
So I walk on into evening,
Thinking, perhaps I'll meet you there,
But as the sun sets on the ocean,
My mind is here, my heart is there.
I'm feeling rather nostalgic. Its a Sunday and I'm spending time at home resting. Digging up some stuffs from my com and my poly years. Brings back memories.
The lecture notes. I still do have them. With all those random drawings during bored lectures, or just random shadings. Found the piece of formula sheet from one of the exams. Lol. I miss studying.
On my com, the old jamming recordings. Memories, memories. Damn we sucked last time! Our guitar tone was horrible and playing wise, I won't comment. Haha. Big difference.
The mouse pad; Barracuda. Remind me of the gaming days. Hours in the atrium. Hours in the lan shop. Growing fat every minute. Lol.
And then, I rummage through my wallet. Found a name card of this particular modeling agency. Lol. Still remember they're asking me to be a sport's wear model. What the heck? Me? Sports model? lol!
And I found a pair of used "Over the hedge" movie tickets. =)
Happy times, shall never be forgotten.
Ok, end of the trip down memory lane. Time to sleep.
The lecture notes. I still do have them. With all those random drawings during bored lectures, or just random shadings. Found the piece of formula sheet from one of the exams. Lol. I miss studying.
On my com, the old jamming recordings. Memories, memories. Damn we sucked last time! Our guitar tone was horrible and playing wise, I won't comment. Haha. Big difference.
The mouse pad; Barracuda. Remind me of the gaming days. Hours in the atrium. Hours in the lan shop. Growing fat every minute. Lol.
And then, I rummage through my wallet. Found a name card of this particular modeling agency. Lol. Still remember they're asking me to be a sport's wear model. What the heck? Me? Sports model? lol!
And I found a pair of used "Over the hedge" movie tickets. =)
Happy times, shall never be forgotten.
Ok, end of the trip down memory lane. Time to sleep.
Friday, July 06, 2007
Someone told me something which I find is quite true.
Girls who enjoys clubbing, and clubs often, are usually depressed, emo or have low self esteem. In Singapore that is. Overseas are just pure fun. They tend to fake that they're in control. Lol.
Dude, done my own research. How true indeed.
Oh, and do watch Metal: A headbanger's Journey @ www.jonhs.com.
It's a documentary about Metal and its histories. You'll understand why we love Metal and why it's still around no matter all the critics, the sues and the outcasts.
The Metal heads are just a bunch of weirdos to the outside world, who doesn't give a fuck about what the outside world thinks, who doesn't give a damn who his or her friends are, who doesn't give a shit about how people won't like us the way we are.
The fan base are much more loyal to the music than in any other genre. A metal song can go down the decades and still be someone's life changing song. A pop song that was played 5 years ago is called classics. A metal song that's played 20 years ago is still evergreen. Go watch the documentary.
Proud to be a headbanger.
Girls who enjoys clubbing, and clubs often, are usually depressed, emo or have low self esteem. In Singapore that is. Overseas are just pure fun. They tend to fake that they're in control. Lol.
Dude, done my own research. How true indeed.
Oh, and do watch Metal: A headbanger's Journey @ www.jonhs.com.
It's a documentary about Metal and its histories. You'll understand why we love Metal and why it's still around no matter all the critics, the sues and the outcasts.
The Metal heads are just a bunch of weirdos to the outside world, who doesn't give a fuck about what the outside world thinks, who doesn't give a damn who his or her friends are, who doesn't give a shit about how people won't like us the way we are.
The fan base are much more loyal to the music than in any other genre. A metal song can go down the decades and still be someone's life changing song. A pop song that was played 5 years ago is called classics. A metal song that's played 20 years ago is still evergreen. Go watch the documentary.
Proud to be a headbanger.
Monday, July 02, 2007
