Dying To Be Alive

There is a constant struggle within me,
And it is raging deep inside.
It kills me that I can't stop it,
As of now my hands are tied.

I used to think it was the world,
And I carried that weight on my back.
It's like I'm wearing a blindfold,
Because I perceive my world as black.

I can't continue to live this way,
It's killing me bit by bit.
My life is like a puzzle,
And some pieces just don't seem to fit.

I used to wear a constant smile,
And nothing could get me down,
But times change and things happen,
Now it's a constant frown.

The feelings are growing more intense,
The battles are lasting longer,
Yet I am starting to fight them in a different way,
Maybe I am getting stronger.

I feel I'm strong enough to beat this,
And I know I can survive.
One thing that I have failed to realize,
Is that I am dying to be alive.
  ¶ 10:11 PM