Back from camp. Shitty. Its a damn shitty feeling to be in camp while you're all troubled with yourself. You have no privacy. You can't sleep. Everything around you seems to notice your every move. Its kinda irritating you see. Ah well.
I'm down with depression. That's official. Doc said that. Gah. Whatever. Still went through with IPPT, without sleep and food, not much happened. Its all in the mind as they say.
Met up with Jason after book out. Went to the old Bukit Batok West Mac to chill and chat about stuffs, band and all, catching up. Haven't been spending time with my close friends, so does he. Talked about so much stuffs, it seems like as if we hadn't sit down and talk for years. Damn NS. Destroying our social life. We bumped into, or rather they bumped into us, Ibsen and his girlfriend (kinda forgot her name. Oops.) at the mac later on. Had a short chat with each other, telling him about the gig and stuffs.
Made plans for jamming tommorrow at the new Garage Studios. Wonder how will it be like there. The old one kinda suck though. Hope it's improved now. Had to polish up our playing and decide on our theme for our clothes and others. Jason had this cool idea of buying plain T-shirts and write the names of Iron Maiden's members on each of us to represent which of us are playing who, eg. Jason drums will be Nicko. Kinda cool yet posers but who cares! Up the Irons!
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The human being is a fragile specimen of life. It seems as though we rule this world but in fact, we are just being played by it, played by life. Which makes us wonder what, why and how are we alive and be the person that you are. We are all slaved by our own emotions and feelings, both do either harm or good to us. Can't we understand ourselves sometimes? Isn't there a reason why certain things are just unexplainable. The fact that most of us do not know the purpose of us being alive, is probably because we just couldn't find an appropriate purpose to be committed to. Its inevitable that sometimes things just go against our way and that somehow we just couldn't pull away from the current. As the saying says 'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em'. Will letting the current drag you to a calm lake? Or just takes you to a waterfall where you'll plummeted into the depths?
Things aren't clear for now. Loosing strength to be fighting with the current. Risking it to go with the flow. Closing my eyes, calming myself. What happen next, only time will tell.
